February 2012
1 post
Deleted.
Just went and deleted the majority of my tumblr posts. Kept some favorites of mine. Want to start again. Get committed to blogging. This is me. I am back. Hello. I also need to start making more videos. Start filming my lol jokes. I need to be more creative in general. Stop being such a lazy sod. That is all for now. Here is a picture.
Frankston Pub Rule no. 47
Never stab a man at the urinal. Piss could go everywhere.
Be a man. Drink Passion Pop.
December 2010
5 posts
September 2010
1 post
It's easy for girls to have sex. It's harder for...
That’s a double entendre.
August 2010
2 posts
A female dinosaur hugged me.
She raptor arms around me.
The doorman by Aiden Pyne
He won’t let you in. No, he won’t let you in. He dances on his off nights and bounces on his on nights. He won’t let you in. No, he won’t let you in. He punched a guy in the face once. He copped a feel of a breast once. He won’t let you in. No, he won’t let you in. Not with those shoes. Not with that shirt. You waited in line but he won’t let you in. No,...
June 2010
1 post
You're just a fucking pie. Outsane by Aiden Pyne.
Meat. Gravy. Pastry. A fucking pie. That is all you are. A fucking pie. I eat you and you burn my tongue. I go “ouch” and then I put you back in my mouth. For you are a pie and I am hungry. I am hungry for you. You, which is pie. Pie. Nom nom nom. I nom on you. You fucking pie. You burnt my tongue. You cause my mouth pain and yet I continue to eat you. Fucking pie.
Am I insane? Do I...
March 2010
3 posts
Nerds out of love: Cause you just won't get any.
When I grow attached to someone and develop feelings of “Like” towards them and they don’t feel the same way (which is a lot) I tend to distance myself as far as I can from that person. Recently I made a friendship weird and awkward because I told the friend that I had a crush on them when I wasn’t even sure that I did in fact have a crush on them. It was a “I’m...
“Well I’d offer you hugs but girls get angry when you hug them whilst they...”
– Something you shouldn’t really say to a girl who has her period.
February 2010
3 posts
If I were in a band...
The genre would be Emo/Punk and the band’s name would be “The sound you slit your wrists to” and we will sing songs about how fucking miserable we are after you fucking left us you fucking whore.
January 2010
4 posts
Nerds in love 3: Nothing to do with nerds really....
I’ve only had one girlfriend because you know how everyone has a trait that they are attracted to. Well, one of my friends likes girls with musical ability, another friend likes Asian girls. I don’t care much for either of those things. I like girls who aren’t interested in me. For instance the last girl I had a crush on was a lesbian. Keyword: Was. She has a boyfriend now and...
The second part to Nerds in love which is about...
It’s weird for them to be together but I’m happy for them cause they’re happy. I have to be happy for them. They probably wouldn’t be my friends if I frowned upon their happiness but I wish I had that happiness. In my entire nineteen years of existence I have had only one girlfriend and when she dumped me all my friends were telling me that there are plenty more fish in the...
Nerds in love.
I have nerd friends. Two of these nerd friends, Sam and Rachel, just started dating and Sam has confided in me that they have become intimate. They’ve made love. They’ve introduced their nether regions and that’s weird because nerds don’t have sex. I know that for a fact. I’ve never had sex. He also told me something I rather not have been told. He also told me that...
You ever wonder if you could secretly be a robot?
Like when you write “Hahaha” online but in real life you felt no emotion at all.
Or like when someone says “Wow, this is so amazing” but you look at it and don’t think it’s anything special.
Or like when you open the side of your stomach, pull out a power cable and recharge over night.
Sometimes I think I could secretly be a robot.
June 2009
2 posts
April 2009
1 post
March 2009
2 posts
What's the difference between me and a fridge?
Fridges are cool.
What's the difference between me and paper?
Paper is thin.
August 2008
1 post
May 2008
1 post
